Maurette's Adventures

How to cope with guilty feelings when indulging in sweet delicious food? One day we were in the office and by magical star alignment all of us ladies were either having a period or ovulating so there was no one to stop the sudden chocolate urges. Rule of advice always have a chocolate urge stopper on speed dial. Now, ladies and gents, do not conveniently forget how to use the speed dial or send a text message instead like I do. Anyway, so there we went across the street to buy all kinds of chocolate and sugary goodness. When we walked in the office, one of my colleagues had already devoured her chocolate. So I asked her: "But what the hell?". She said, "The faster I eat it, the less time I have to change my mind." Got to love it.

This blog started out as a repository of my funny stories along my travels. Through life's twists and turns I don't have as many funny encounters with strangers anymore. Mostly because I am now more of a home body and (not afraid to admit) I do not look around because what I want is at home waiting for me. One thing that has not changed is my constant struggle with loosing weight. All my previous posts have been written with a serious and often sad undertone but not anymore. I am taking the road traveled by many and I hope that I reach the end just as millions have done before me. From now on I am back to funny, yet funny about living with extra baggage. Or with permanent cushions. Join me on my journey of loosing weight, the fun way. How many of you actually think I am tall? Let me let you in on a secret .... I am short but my butt actually adds at least 5 inches. Seriously, I can sit next to a 5'8" goddess and look taller than her .... Let's hear a big YOOHOO...

I'm engaged. Yes, I have promised someone to become their wife. Or maybe I should say I have given him the privilege of becoming my husband. I think my inner goddess is smiling at that statement. Anyway, so now that That happened I am fighting this same inner goddess about the matter of last names. Do I take his last name and if so what happens to my own last name??? For ages it has been customary that a woman takes her husbands last name. Something to do with fathers selling off their unwanted daughters as they are a pain in the behind and attribute nothing to them or society. Women were meant to be seen and to bed. Or breed as they say here in St. Maarten. As women were not allowed to work and most were raised to be too weak and dainty, someone to take care of, they were not contributing so fathers were much too happy to pass them on to a next victim. Hence, they forgo their birth name and take on someone else's. Y'all realize that I have a gazillion problems with this...

Two years ago, I had my gastric bypass. From other reports that I read peoples life changed. Most of them think that it was the best thing they ever did. Pounds, kilos, fat was just melting away and all problems magically disappeared. Two hundred and three hundred pounds weight loss is pretty common. Not for me. Life change? Sure, I am now more active. I eat healthy, I can do hours of exercise. But those melting pounds ... I have yet to see them. Sure for the first 6 months, I could barely eat so I was ecstatic to be able to change my clothes. Get a new wardrobe. Boy, was that exciting. But then it stopped. It is not easy, especially knowing about all those other people who have reached their ideal weight. Those lucky ones who can walk among the rest and be 'normal'. Who are not fat anymore. Who can sit and walk and not worry about how their clothes look on them. Who do not have to feel left out because they cannot go diving. When did things change? I am sure it cannot be t...

A few months ago, a friend asked me why anyone would want to be in a relationship. For all the hurt and limitations you experience, why put yourself through it. Especially if you are independent and strong enough to be by yourself.  My answer was that Together is Better .... in a way.  But, this person said, whatever happened to the independent you. The one who I could call at any time and was up for anything. The one I could just call on to just st and watch tv. I do remember that person. I remember the times when I can do and go where and when I want. I still do but there is always that pull. My thoughts are not surrounded by I's anymore but I now think in terms of We. I remember working late or early and not feeling guilty. I remember calling any of my friends male or female and not having a second thought about it. For me, men and women can be friends. I remember lazy Sundays and loud farts. I remember weekends without speaking to anyone but the casual hello from th...

Today we rode in the back of a police buggy, chased a police car and begged to be handcuffed. All of that in the span of one hour. Let me explain to you what happened... At work we are busy with this project where we need to map the whole of St. Maarten, the dutch side. This means walking and recording every lot on this beautiful island. Right around midday we found ourselves on one side of town, with the office on the opposite side. Hunger and fatigue were battling against each other and we really were not looking forward to the walk back. So we were sitting on a bench conversating with one of the police officers on bike patrol, trying to catch ourselves before starting the trek back to work when along comes the police buggy. It looks like a golf cart but I am sure it has a lot more horsepower. I joked with the sergeant and told him if we couldn't bum a ride back to the office. To my surprise he went and told them to take us back to the office. So there we were in the back on the...

One of my colleagues girlfriend decided that they needed to get married. In and on itself, not a problem ... more power to them, right? Except ... the party. Let me explain to you guys how this party is going to go. - Every invited guest gets a band, you know like those that you get when you go in a club. With that band you can get 2 free drinks and 1 snack. Anything over that you have to pay for - An uninvited guest, of which there are many as no one likes this girl, has to pay for everything even tap water. - The song that will be played as the bride walks down the aisle is that years road march. After hearing all of that, do you know what my reaction was: Maybe you should have a jukebox instead of a DJ as then you can keep the quarters people will throw in.