Be Careful of the Loose Tigra

Tigra is quietly slumbering in her cage. She doesn't quite like it in there but I throw her a bone once in awhile.  Occasionally she stirs and growls for some attention. Just like a child I give in randomly and sometimes I ignore her. Night will come and the sun always rises, right? I have to keep savoring the moments where she is allowed to stick a paw through the door because they are not very frequent and just like chocolate you have to enjoy it when you get it.
Yesterday, Tigra started to pace again and I decided that She was allowed some fun. I could throw her a doll to play with as a reward for good behaviour. So me and J got in the car and went looking for Officer Sexy. (Oh gosh she is purring again just listening to me talking about this. Down girl down!). We drove around the streets of Philipsburg trying to find the yellow shirts of the bike patrol to no avail. We even came up with the idea to start a fight just so they have to come out of their hiding place. I would slam on the brakes, open the door and push J out of the car. She would then start yelling and screaming and getting on like a fish wife while I tell her to get out of the car with her trifling behind and stop sleeping with other people's men. She would pick up a rock and threaten to throw a rock at my car. At this point we hope that the bike patrol would have arrived because she can't look stupid by not throwing the rock. People would think she was a coward. And if she found that the rock needed to be launched, all I have to say is that she better miss my car by a mile. Now, y'all know that didn't happen right? We have big mouths and very small hearts. Tigra had to be pacified with a rare steak instead. This is probably why I can hear the rumble in her belly.
Tomorrow I am off to Bangkok for a week. The question now is, should Tigra come out to play in Bangkok or not? I mean the place is three days of travelling away from my current home so how bad or embarrassing can it get? There are no mouths to start gossiping, so why not? To tell you the truth, I can't come up with a single reason why not. Except the big mouth, small heart part but who is low enough to throw my own words back at me.
Do we have a 100% agreement that Tigra is going to be let loose?
That means I am only wearing dresses, skirts and booty shorts when I'm there. The hair will be curly and wild and the lips will be glossing the whole time. Statistical nerds watch out .... there is a tiger loose in the city!

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